I Just Need A Moment Here

I love being a stay-at-home mom. Really, I do.

But some days, I would give a great deal of money just to have a moment alone.

Take today, for example. I only had one item on my to do list: write my post for 5 Minutes for Parenting. Straight-forward. Simple. I even had some topics swirling around in my brain.

But when I sat down this morning to sort my thoughts, Natalie was bored, Connor was picking on his sister and the baby wasn’t happy unless she was being entertained.

So I set the computer aside. I found a project for Natalie, warned Connor that annoying his sister is not an acceptable activity, folded some laundry while making silly faces at Teyla and then put her down for a nap.

Finally. A break.

But ‘twas not to be. The kids stormed in. “We’re bored! No one’s home! We can’t play outside! There’s nothing to do! We’re hungry!”

I could feel the frustration in my shoulders, but I figured it was best to tackle this thing head-on. So we trooped downstairs, ate an early lunch, brainstormed the menu for Natalie’s birthday dinner this weekend and cleaned up the kitchen.

All was quiet. I started my post.

Then, “Mom, I’m still hungry! Mom I want a treat! Mom, Connor’s hitting me! But Mom, Natalie started it by acting like she was hitting me!”

I shut the laptop and herded them outside. “I will come out with you so you can play. But I need 30 minutes of time ALONE. Do not bother me. Do you see the steam coming out my ears? It’s not because it’s hot today. Mommy needs to THINK!”

I set up my chair, they got out their bikes. Two minutes later, the cries began again.

“Watch me, Mom! Look what I can do! I’m thirsty! Can we have a juice box? I want a Popsicle. There’s nothing to do! I’m bored! I need to go to the bathroom! Will you come with me?”

Rinse, recycle, repeat.

Times like this make me wish for family that lived nearby. How lovely to be able to call someone and say, “Please come watch my children, lest I beat them over the head with my computer.”

I’d settle for a babysitter, but ours lives 90 minutes away (one-way), which means it takes a tremendous amount of coordinating (and money) just to get her here once a month for a date night.

And Corey, bless his heart, works like a fiend and has been on the road this year almost as much as the Presidential candidates. I can’t dump the kids on him when I need a break, because I know he needs a break just as much as I do.

So then. The situation, as I see it, is fixed. It’s me and them, them and me. No matter how you toss the dice, it’s meant to be. The only one for me is them and them for me. So happy together.

(Sorry. Since I wasn’t allowed to listen to rock and roll as a teenager – clearly, the beat had Satan in it – I listened to a lot of oldies music. It comes out at the most inappropriate times.)

I’m not one to throw a huge pity party. I’m an optimist. I like to fix things, to move on, to find a solution. (Which means I might not be the best friend to call when you just want a listening ear. I’m really bad at that.) Onward and upward, pip-pip, cheerio and all that rot.

If I can’t get away from the kids – legally, anyway – and yet I need to get away from the kids to preserve my sanity, I will probably have to take drastic action.

I will need to start getting up early if I want some guaranteed alone time, maybe even arising by 6:00 AM.

You have no idea how horrifying that is to me. I am NOT a morning person. Not. I was happiest when I worked on the 11:00 PM news. I got up around 10:00 AM, went to work around 2:00 PM, got home around 12:00 AM, had ice cream around 12:30 AM, went to sleep around 1:00 AM. Happy, happy, joy, joy.

So getting up – on purpose – around 6:00 AM?!? It hurts. Ow. Ow.

But I see no other solution. (Do you?!?) And my sanity will thank me. (Right?!?)

*Forgot to add: Staying up late isn't really an option, since my husband likes it when I go to bed with him, and I'm trying to respect that. But maybe he and I can work something out.