God Made Me Weird and He Loves Me Very Much

A few days weeks months back, the Queen B reached out her golden scepter and tagged me with the 7 Random Things meme.

I told her I would get right on it.

Ahem.

In my defense, I'm a recovering late-a-holic in real life, and I'm doing such a good job staying on the straight and narrow (I was 10 minutes early to church yesterday -- for the third week in a row), I was bound to backslide somewhere.

Hey look! I just told you an extra random thing. This is your lucky Monday! Go! Now! Buy a lotto ticket!

1. I love prunes dried plums. Truly. And don't roll your eyes at me. Have you tried Sunsweet's Cherry Essence Prunes Dried Plums? If you haven't, don't judge. They are yummy. I'll say it again -- yummy.

2. You know how I sprinkle my blog posts with the word dude? That's not a gimmick. I really do say dude. Like, all the time. I also like to imagine I'm a surfer. But I'm not. The closest I came was boogie-boarding off the coast of Del Mar with Mindy when she lived with us for a summer. It was fun and cold and I hit my head on the sea floor a lot and got sand embedded in my scalp. Young boys laughed at us, mostly because we had no freakin' clue. But we didn't care. Because, dude, we were practically catching gnarly waves! Totally wicked.

(Anyone else hearing Crush in their head right now? Or is it only me?)

3. When I was a teenager, I qualified for Mensa.

And look at me now.

4. I can't go to sleep without some sort of a blanket. Even if it's 95 degrees in my bedroom. I must have a covering.

The only exception to this rule is when I'm lying in the sun, because I can definitely fall asleep lying on the beach on a gorgeous summer day. I like to think the sun's warmth acts as a kind of blanket. A blanket of ultraviolet light and Vitamin D. Try to get that at Target.

5. I might faint if you touch my eyeball. I discovered this nifty little factoid two years ago when I went to seen an ophthalmologist. Since I hadn't been to the eye doctor in about, oh, 34 years, they ran a full battery of tests on me, including the one where they put numbing drops in your eye so they can do the glaucoma pressure test. About 30 seconds after the test, I started to get light-headed, nauseous and sweaty. I was able to mumble, "I think I'm going to pass out," to the nurse just as everything was going black. She was able to help me to the floor before I lost consciousness.

Turns out, it's a not-all-that-uncommon phenomenon. My ophthalmologist said his best friend in medical school actually had a guy pass out cold three seconds after the glaucoma test was done. He was so stunned, he just let the guy drop like a rock; he didn't even try to catch him. Not his proudest moment, I'm guessing.

As you might imagine, I'm not a candidate for contacts. Ever.

6. I have never watched "American Idol." I prefer to remember Paula Abdul back when she was straight up forever my girl.

7. I would live in Narnia, if given the chance. I read The Chronicles obsessively when I was young. I would start on book one, read through to book seven, then start over again -- and I did that for about six years. (Which means I've read The Chronicles of Narnia more than I've read the Bible, I just realized. And that's a little sad.) Aslan was the first real representation of Christ to me. My faith has been profoundly impacted by C.S. Lewis' imaginary world.

And yet, I haven't seen "Prince Caspian" yet. Does anyone want to babysit?

I'm now supposed to tag seven people. I'm going to choose some bloggers old* -- Baby Bangs and The Preacher's Wife -- some bloggers new -- It's Almost Naptime and Sorta Crunchy -- a blogger borrowed -- Naval Gazing, but Sue's address is really Borrowed Light, did you know that? -- and some bloggers whose toes are blue** -- Badgers on the Loose and A Latte Talk.

*bloggers who've been willfully subjecting themselves to my blog for a year or more
**bloggers who also live in Minnesota