Hello. My Name is Kelly. I'm an Internet Addict.

Well my friends. I think it's time to be honest. To lay it all out on the table.

I think I have a problem with the Internet. The first thing I do in the morning when I get up is turn on my laptop. I spend countless hours most days sitting in front of my screen, doing everything from reading news or commentary to checking my Bloglines account multiple times. I see my life through the lens of "what would make a good blog post." At dinner, I talk to my husband about the funny stories I've read online that day, and before I go to bed, I check my e-mail again.

It's not right.

And it's starting to take over.

I opened my journal last week (which I keep on my computer, since I type at lightening speed and my handwriting has evolved into a series of cramped, illegible marks on paper) and discovered -- to my horror -- that the last time I had journaled was May 9. And before that, April 15. And most of the journal entries in April were copies of posts I had written for this blog.

I was aghast. I started this blog because I love writing, it seemed like a good outlet for some creative energy, and I was impressed with the talent out there in the blogosphere.

But it's not an outlet right now. A better analogy would be a drain. It's become all-consuming, to the point where I'm not recording my personal thoughts and prayers to my God anymore. That can't continue.

So I think I'm going to take a bit of a blogging break for a few weeks and see if I can achieve some balance in my life. (Plus, we're getting ready to move in less than a month. I'm sure my world will be turned upside down for a while, making blogging more difficult.) That's not to say I won't be around. I might. I just don't want blogging (and/or reading posts, commenting on posts, or staying current with the news in every time zone) to consume me anymore. I want to play with my kids without running to my computer every 10 minutes. I want to wake up to my Bible instead of my laptop. I want to enjoy the last few days we have in this beautiful house -- and I want to write about all these things in my journal without feeling guilty that I haven't posted to my blog that day.

Most of all, I want my writing to be first and foremost for God, not for an audience -- no matter how wonderful that audience may be. Warren Wiersbe, a dear family friend, sent me this quote a number of years ago when we were corresponding about the writing life. I have never forgotten it.

If you write for God, you will reach many people and bring them joy.
If you write for people, you may make some money and you may give someone a little joy and you may make a noise in the world for a little while.
If you write for yourself, you can read what you yourself have written and after 10 minute, you will be so disgusted you will wish you were dead.
- Thomas Merton

Right now, I write on my blog for people. I want it to be more than that.

See you soon dear friends.