Until I’ve worn the same sweater three days in one week and I have no other options to cover my bulging tummy and I feel like I’m going to go mad if I have to keep wearing the same clothes over and over and over again. Then, I'm a woman perturbed.
(Incidentally, you know how people say some pregnant women look like they’ve swallowed a basket ball? I’ve decided I look just like that. Only substitute beach ball and add in a few slices of birthday cake on the back end.)
(Because, good night people. Between my December OB appointment, which was right before Christmas, and my January OB appointment, which was five weeks later, I gained 10 pounds. Maybe I should say I had only gained 10 pounds, because in that time period, I had three Christmases to celebrate and Teyla’s and my birthday cake to bake and eat, so 10 pounds feels like a victory to me. Consider that I ate almost every single slice of my birthday cake, as well as the leftover cupcakes from Teyla’s party because a. we didn’t have anyone other than our immediate family over to celebrate, b. my husband doesn’t eat sweets and c. I was not about to throw chocolate buttercream or lemon curd in the garbage. Amen.)
So last Friday, I was getting dressed, and almost everything I put on would not stay down over my exposed whale flesh. And lo, that is not a cute look.
And that’s how I found myself standing in a Motherhood Maternity store approximately two hours later.
I went in armed with a healthy dose of skepticism modified with dollop of desperation. And while I did have to endure a kind but wacky saleswoman (“I really think professional football is horrible, don’t you? I mean, did you see the pictures of Brett Favre’s leg this week? I hurt my ankle one time and it looked just like that, all black and green and blue, the bruise went all the way to my hip. And to think the players from the other team kept going after him. I mean, they could have killed him. Really. Criminal charges should be filed.”), I left an hour later with a bag full of new shirts that both cover the whale flesh comfortably and look cute without costing a ton.
Happy, happy, joy, joy.
I got a couple of long-sleeved t-shirts (one white, one pink) for $9.99 each. I replaced my white maternity layering tank that I can’t find for the life of me for only $12.99. And I got these two kicky shirts, which made me very happy.
End result? I almost doubled my winter wardrobe (and since that pink t-shirt is technically short-sleeved, I added to my spring/summer maternity box as well) for about $80.
Lucky for me, I don’t plan to return any of it.
Humble pie isn’t so bitter with a side of cute clothes.
