It's My Party, and I'll Whine If I Want To

So today is my birthday.

And I’m not having a good day. It’s pretty stinky, actually.

I could enumerate all the reasons why I’m sinking into the pit of despair, but I doubt dwelling on them would do me any good. This is definitely one of those count-your-blessings type of moments. I need an attitude adjustment.


Problem is, I’ve had so many crummy days lately, my attitude adjustment wrench is getting a little bent out of shape. I’m starting to think things like, “Here’s a blessing! I have a fork, which I could stick into my eyeballs.”

So help me, wonderful Internet friends. I need some laughter, I need some fun, I need some encouragement. (And all the more as you see the day approaching. Trust me, it’s full-out bearing down on me right now.)

Hit me.

38 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday!!!

    I'm a new reader, searched for minnesota mom bloggers and came across your site in my various clicking. Thank you for putting your heart out in the blogging community and providing something great for other's to read! I don't have a blog, so nothing to share back with you other than I'm from MN and am expecting my first child, so maybe I'll be a MN mom blogger in 7.5 months?? :-)

    Hope you have a better day!

    KC

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  2. http://granolasdodallas.blogspot.com/2009/01/dunkin.html

    I'm not feeling at all funny today. But this post I've added here is HILARIOUS (and not very long) For a laugh. :)

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  3. that says dunkin.html

    in case you can't see the end of the url. :)

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  4. You and your family have truly been in my thoughts & prayers all day.

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  5. Happy Birthday!!!! I've got nothing to make you laugh. Sorry.

    However. My actual birthday stunk big last week and the day after was quite lovely. So here's hoping for a better tomorrow!

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  6. Hey girl! Pip Pip! Chin Up! And all that other perky jazz.

    Wallow tonight...wallow till you just can't wallow no more, tomorrow is a new day. You can wake up with a clean slate and a new attitude.

    Saw your tweets today and am SO GLAD about your mom. Seriously, that is the best birthday gift.

    Wish I had something that could make you laugh, but it's late and I've run out of funny for today, my prayers for you will have to do and they are going up right now.

    Hang in there Kel!

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  7. Happy Birthday!! I enjoy reading your blog. You are an encouragement to me. I will pray you find that peace only God can bring.

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  8. Happy Birthday, Kelly! Don't know if this is the kind of humor that will cheer you up, but if you go to YouTube and type in "Jesus Dubs" and watch #1 through #4 (it is all the more funny if you watched this movie growing up). A bit sacreligious, but I get a huge laugh out of it.

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  9. Oooh! I'm back with something funny to tell to put a smile on your face.

    Over the New Year's weekend we made a trek up to Cascade Mtn. in central Wisconsin. When we got there, my husband a professional snowboarder (NOT) deemed the powder (and yes, he uses the word powder) too icy and therefore too dangerous for the kids to go down. So since we'd made the 2 and 1/2 hour trek North we opted to buy tubing passes while we were there. Now, keep in mind the tubing runs are just as icy, but we do it anyway. Because we are geniuses.
    Now this is the part that will make you laugh...I went down the tubing run, first time down, and couldn't stop. The run was as icy as a luge. Apparently the ice and my excess poundage gave me the ability to fly down the tube luge at an alarming speed. Do you know how I stopped? Well, all the panicked screaming I was doing didn't slow me down at all and I landed in the bright orange safety net fence thing at the bottom of the hill which protects people from flying over a dropoff into the parking lot. And I got stuck in it. I dangled there in the orange safety net thing till someone could help me get up. Did you get the party about me dangling? And being stuck? DANGLING in the orange net over the parking lot. And I'm pretty sure the tramp stamp area of my back was exposed for the world down below in the parking lot to see. I will stick to the snowboarding from now on.

    But the funniest part? Later in the night, I'm sitting on a bench at the bottom of the hill, sipping my hot chocolate, watching my people tube luge their little hearts out and I started chatting with these people. And they ask me, 'Did you see that lady? The one that flew into the safety net?' And I'm all like, 'Yeah! We saw that too! I couldn't believe that happened to her.' Because really, was I supposed to say Yo. People. Safety net chick in the houwwwse? I don't think so. I prefer to do my stunts anonymously. And I had a reversable coat on and I totally turned it to the other side so nobody would know it was me.

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  10. Happy birthday, my favorite imaginary friend! You bless my life in so many ways. I agree with what you said to me in my Christmas card: we're destined to be real-life friends some day. That's not funny or bound to cheer you up, but know that you are loved on your birthday.

    Let me see if I can think of something funny for you... have you ever been to this site: http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/. Peruse a few pages, and I promise you'll get a good laugh or five.

    Happy birthday, friend! Love ya!

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  11. Heather's link to dunkin made me laugh... but only because it wasn't my child.

    Happy birthday, Kelly.

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  12. Happy Birthday! Your blog FINALLY came up with posts in the middle instead of being all blank.

    You mean that cute little one-year-old isn't making you smile?! What's up with that? Is she being a toot today?

    Been thinking about you every time the news comes on KLOVE and they talk about how COLD it is up north today.

    Smile. It will be a balmy 30 degrees before you know it!

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  13. Happy Happy Birthday!!

    I spent my 30th birthday scrubbing my cupboards. 30!!! Not that I'm bitter. I think I had frozen pizza.

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  14. i think i'm feeling a lot like you are right now. at least it's not my birthday! :) well, happy birthday to you. i hope you find some sunshine and cheer.

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  15. Remember that time I lost your head? Would it make you feel better to lose my head?

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  16. Happy 28th!
    Or so.
    SO, this cop pulls over a little old lady for speeding. He asks her if she knows what she pulled her over for.
    She replies, "I'm not sure, is it because I stole the car?"
    "You stole the car?" "Yep and the gun I used is still in the trunk" "You have a gun in the trunk?" Yep.

    He frantically runs back to the squad car and calls for backup.

    His sergeant pulls up and approaches the lady.

    "Ma'am is this your car?"
    "yes sir. Here's the license and registration."
    "Ma'am the responding officer claims you said that the car was stolen and there was a gun in the trunk."
    She pops the trunk indignantly and shows him there's only her walker.
    The sergeant apologizes profusly and says, "I am sorry, I'm just acting on what the officer claimed you said."

    "I'll bet that liar said i was speeding too."

    Oh and it's gonna be colder in Alabama this week than in Calgary. I'm smiling just thinking about all the Southernsicles.

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  17. Hey girl...sorry you had a crummy birthday. I like to have whiney days sometimes, too. I think it's normal. And if it makes you feel better, you've been awarded an award on my blog. I started the post earlier today and had already decided I was going to give you the award just because I think you are so cool and I love your writing style. Then I read this post and thought it was even more fitting! Maybe give you a little cheer, not that a short, white gal from west Texas awarding you with a "Butterfly Award" could make you more cheerful, but hey, I can try, right?

    Proverbs 17:22 "A joyful heart is good medicine, But a broken spirit dries up the bones." My kids sing a Steve Green Bible verse song to that verse and when they're grumpy, I sing it to them. They need to start singing it to me sometimes, too; honestly. We all have our days. But tomorrow is a new day! A clean slate! Have a happy day!

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  18. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rToKEnySb7s&eurl=

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  19. love you sis! i'm sorry i haven't been a great uncle outside of holidays... happy b-day! hope to see you soon.

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  20. Happy Birthday Kelly! Thank you for your blog and all the sleep training wisdom!! I think you're just fabulous Birthday Girl! :)

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  21. Aw, sweetheart! Happy Birthday!!

    This always makes me laugh:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGOohBytKTU&feature=related

    or this

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmDTSQtK20c

    hope that helps :)

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  22. oh, but this is my favorite

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=64a_1fWTsls&feature=related

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  23. Happy Birthday to you! YOU are a gift to this world.

    As for funny, the most recent funny in my home was when I quickly ran into the house to use the bathroom between errands. I quickly parked the car, threw the keys into my pocket, and dashed for master bedroom bath. It was urgent, I tell you! (That's because I've had four babies! :-) Anyway, as I stood up, I flushed the toilet while at the same time pulling up my pants. And wouldn't you know it, the keys fell out of my pocket just as the toilet was flushing and there was no catching them; my keys (along with the alarm fob) were gone.

    I was so frustrated that I yelled out, "I flushed my keys down the toilet!"

    Then my 18 year-old daughter, who happened to be in the kitchen, yelled back, "Well, I hope you always flush your pee down the toilet!"

    Classic! I still giggle when I think that she really thought I would yell out that I had flushed my pee down the toilet! :-)

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  24. Happy Birthday, and belated Happy Birthday to the adorable Teyla!

    Um, I'm nursing a sinus infection here (oh I hope not). My last birthday sucked too. But in honour of your special day, I'm sending you a thought: "You're the most beautiful girl in the room." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmDTSQtK20c
    Hope you like it! (there's a few concepts...not kid-appropriate.) It's a paean to poor compliments.

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  25. Sorry I missed this yesterday, mama!

    Missy's just being humble - her post yesterday was pretty funny. Got me to giggling anyway!

    http://itsalmostnaptime.blogspot.com/2009/01/oh-my-brain-how-i-miss-it.html

    Hope today is SO MUCH BETTER!

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  26. Happy birthday! You need to eat some cake with lots of icing and maybe even some ice cream.

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  27. Happy Belated Birthday Kelly. Many virtual kisses and hugs to one of my favorite bloggers. I'm sorry things are poopy.

    If you need a huge belly laugh, go here:

    http://www.candyboots.com/wwcards/czarina.html

    Scroll down and click on the "Click Here to Start the Tour" page. It's hilarious. One or two swear words, but worth it. Hope it makes you smile. :>

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  28. Like my grandmother always said: "This too shall pass."

    She also said: "Life ain't all beer and skittles."

    (I'm not sure if it was skittles or vittles or what, but I always said skittles, and no one ever corrected me because they probably thought it was funny I was saying it wrong.)

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  29. Sorry I'm a day late, but I hope you had a better day than you expected! :-)

    Hang in there; the Lord's mercies are indeed new every! single! morning!

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  30. Oh my goodness, happy birthday!

    If I were there I'd take you to Moose's Tooth for pizza and that would help. Food always helps :)

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  31. Okay, so I've been lurking around your blog long enough without commenting. :)
    I love to read your writing, and I've had many crummy days where you have encouraged me! Thank you!
    I love how you think. :)

    Happy Birthday!

    Susan from PA

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  32. Have a better day. You could be me, they cancelled school today because it MIGHT snow. Not because it was actually snowing. Ahh, we New Englanders are an interesting bunch. I know you MN girls would laugh at something like a "maybe" snow school cancellation!

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  33. Happy Belated Birthday! Hope the past few days have been better.

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  34. I have been feeling that exact same way. Honestly, I have. I suggest going and reading my blog. I posted one about my jeans today, "The genes of my jeans," and I have no idea if you will like it, but it might help. Just an idea.

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  35. Happy Belated Birthday! Sorry it was a stinky one! Hopefully things are better... although I just read your tweet about canceling the Hawaii trip! Sending you rays of sunshine!

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  36. It's January - just hang in there. Everyone is sounding this way right now (at least all you bloggers in Minnesota, say, and New England).

    And check out Derfwad Manor, if you haven't already. She cracks me up.

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  37. I could have written this post, complete with the fact that my birthday was this week (Monday) and it was terrible.

    Happy birthday, and I'm glad to hear that your day improved!!

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